THE ENNEGRAM PERSONALITY STYLES ASSESSMENTS & COACHING: PERSONALITY PROFILING AND PATTERN IDENTIFICATION
The Enneagram provides a powerful framework for accelerating self-knowledge, for releasing human suffering; for living life with more awareness, flexibility and effectiveness; and for experiencing the expansiveness and liberation of our spirit. Through the Enneagram, we discover that we have always held the key to that which we have been seeking.
The Enneagram is an ancient personality system that provides a framework for psychological, emotional and general well-being. It describes 9 distinct and fundamentally different patterns of thinking, feeling, and acting. None of these is any better than any other. “Ennea” is Greek for nine and “gram” means a figure or something drawn.
It is an excellent leadership development tool, as it provides specific development paths and activities tailored to each Enneagram style; leading to satisfying and long lasting results.
Through understanding your personality styles and core motivation, sustainable transformation occurs.
‘The ability to (self) observe without evaluating is the highest form of intelligence.’ Krishnamurti
Our dominant Enneagram styles show up everywhere, i.e. both of home and at work. Hence, it is so effective to address these challenges and blind-stops. For example, different styles procrastinate for different reasons: -- the Loyal Skeptic (also known as Type 6) over thinks what can go wrong and take long to go over into action as their habitual patterns of worry and self-doubt take over. The Peacemaker (type 9) on the other hand, procrastinates because of their innate strategy to consult extensively. The Observer (type 5) conversely may fail to take action in their desire to collect “enough” information.
“Our Enneagram styles are in a sense a trance. Our habit of attention and responses are literally our blind spots.
One consistent thing about our Enneagram styles; it shows up everywhere – at home, work, recreation, school and in our relationships. The same pattern that earned us a promotion also may cost us our marriage. If those patterns show up too often, we get into trouble that can range from being habitually late to flying into rage when someone ignores us.” Out of the box coaching with the Enneagram. Mary Blast
Developing personalized strategies in overcoming these limiting behavior patterns hence prove to be very effective.
The Enneagram also serves as a guide for personal growth and it provides the tools and knowledge to lead teams effectively…
“Leaders, who are aware of their reactive patterns, avoid pitfalls and learn adaptive, flexible behaviour to get the results they want.” Wendy Appel. Inside out Enneagram
Clients often find that, for various reasons, the IMPACT they create, either at work or in their relationships, do not reflect their good INTENTIONS. More often than not, this discovery leads to shock, surprise, sometimes shame, and often self-criticism. Alternatively, at other times, clients may be battling with internal struggles without understanding why all their strategies are failing
As Enneagram Coaches, we guide clients towards self-understanding and support them in recognizing their (behaviour, thinking and feeling) patterns that lead to the actions they may choose. Part of the coaching methodology we teach is called self-observation. With time, clients learn to observe the impact of their thinking and behaviour patterns on their work and personal lives. This takes time and practice, but there is nothing more rewarding than when they start ‘seeing themselves in action’, in other words, when ‘they catch themselves in the act.' To do so, is the starting point of their growth journey of self-management towards self-mastery.
“Through the Enneagram, leadership styles are strengthened in the areas of emotional intelligence; social intelligence; communication, strategy, team development and decision making skills”. Wendy Appel. Enneagram Author
The Enneagram is an exceptional tool to assess strengths, weaknesses, blind-spots and to design tailored development paths. It consists of 9 different personality styles.
By understanding your Enneagram style, you will come home to yourself and you will cultivate an intimate relationship with your Higher or Larger and Expanded Self.
BENEFITS OF WORKING WITH THE ENNEAGRAM
“I am more myself these days. I’m grounded, present and more patient. I’m no longer a super woman. I allow myself to be vulnerable and I ask for help.” - Grace Ruvimbo Chirenje (Zimbabwean Professional) Type 8: Boss/ Leader.
Feel free to complete the typing enquiry form and submit your results to admin@Nurturing-growth.co.za, if you wish to establish your dominant personality style. We look forward to hearing from you.
BACKGROUND TO THE ENNEAGRAM
I am honored to have the opportunity to work with you.
In my work I use a system for understanding personality patterns called the Enneagram. The term ‘Enneagram’ is based on two Greek words for ‘nine’ and ‘a model’ so it just means a model of nine basic styles of personality development. While everyone has all nine patterns to some degree, finding out your core style is really useful in helping us uncover beliefs, fears, and assumptions that guide your decisions and behavior. Most of us developed ways to survive in the world when we were young and we want to have a look at what guides and motivates you now to be sure it is serving you well.
One of the most practical ways of using the Enneagram is in our relationships, at home and at work. By understanding our own patterns, defensive reactions and blind spots we are able to become more flexible and skillful with the people in our lives. When we understand how others think and feel, we become more tolerant and compassionate. It describes both our higher potentials and our limitations.
We can begin discovering your core type by having you complete this questionnaire. Please think about what you were like during your twenties and thirties when you answer the questions below.
We’re going to go through a brief narrative of all Nine Types so that you get a flavor for each, how different they are and which ones are most familiar to you. After each narrative, take a moment and think whether it resonated with you and or if it didn’t. Although everyone has just one core Type, we visit or access at least three other Types at different times; it’s a complex and dynamic system.
STEP III: Narratives of Enneagram Types
People say that I’m bold, strong, decisive, and sometimes a bull in a china shop. Well, I definitely wouldn’t call myself delicate or touchy feely, and ‘weak’ is not in my vocabulary. I’m direct, honest and forthcoming, and look for the same in others. Everyone expects me to be the strong one, the rock, and I am. At the same time, I’ve been called a Mack truck filled with marshmallows and that’s not far from the truth. I protect those I care about, but don’t have much time for people who don’t put out effort. I always make sure people are treated fairly and justly, especially those that can’t stand up for themselves. I can hold my own in any situation and I’m glad I’m so capable. I make things happen, I’m assertive, and I like to take the lead, so I often find myself in charge - the boss. I’ve been told that I’m “too much” sometimes, but I’m just who I am, no need to apologize for that. Life is here to be lived fully, the more and bigger the better.
People always tell me how easy-going and easy to get along with I am. Plus, I’m relaxed, calm, and a good listener. This is mostly true. Although sometimes, especially when I feel like someone is trying to push me into a decision or urge me to do something I’m not certain about, I can be quietly stubborn and resistant. This is a part of myself I don’t really like to dwell on though, as mostly I think I am a pretty ‘go with the flow’ type of person. It takes a lot to ruffle my feathers. Those who know me well have also called me a ‘peacemaker’ or ‘mediator’. I think it comes from my desire for wanting everyone to feel good and people to live together harmoniously. When that happens I feel content; I really don’t like discord of any kind. Why should there be—we’re all in this together. Why not get along? One downside of being able to see everyone else’s perspective is that it can be hard for me to know what I want and express my own opinions. Sometimes it’s as if what I want or what I have to say is not so important, almost like I don’t matter. But all’s good—everything comes over time.
I like to think of myself as conscientious, hard working, reliable, and a person with high standards. A person of integrity! Some tell me I am a perfectionist and I can understand that because I do like things to be done a certain way. I can get very frustrated with others’ lack of attention to detail and commitment to doing the right thing (sometimes people are so irresponsible and inappropriate!). In most cases, I do think there is a better way to do things and I have a gut sense of that. I’m aware of what isn’t as good as it could be - about what I haven’t done well; what others haven’t done properly; what needs to be done and isn’t being done. As a result, there’s always more to change, to improve. If you really want to know what I see, just ask me, I’m a natural born teacher. People often appreciate my efforts but sometimes they tell me that I’m too judgmental or critical. This feedback is hard for me to hear. I really don’t like to be criticized or corrected (I don’t think anyone would believe how hard I am on myself already). Frustration can be a common experience as I tend to feel it is my responsibility to fix what’s not working and there is much that needs to be made right. If only the world was as glorious, perfect and wonderful as I know it can be!
Mainly I’m interested in “connection” and being kind and loving. And I have lots of energy for it! I mean, isn’t that why we’re here--to take care of and support one another? I don’t want to sound conceited, but I excel at that, I must admit. I can sense what others need almost better than they can. Sometimes I think if someone would care for me as well as I take care of others, I’d have it made! But that is a selfish thought. My goal, my gift, is in giving/helping and I derive incredible satisfaction from it, it’s how I find fulfillment. True, sometimes if my efforts aren’t noticed or appreciated, I can get snippy. All I need is for you to tell me what you love and appreciate about my efforts and to acknowledge me. Then we’re good. Indeed, people call me sensitive and empathetic, and I think that’s true. I’ve always been that way, even as a child.
“I’m on it”, you’ll often hear me say, because I am. In my world-view, life often seems like an endless list of to-do’s and more than anyone else I know, I have the ability to check off my list with the best of ‘em. I have been called an ‘accomplishment machine’ and I can see why. I am usually very busy and rarely take a break to catch my breath. It’s like I have this inner drive that compels me to keep moving, doing and getting things done. But I am grateful for that drive, because it has helped me become very successful at almost anything I want to achieve. Sure, it would probably be good to learn how to slow down and turn my drive down but I don’t know who I’d be if I wasn’t moving, doing and accomplishing all the time. (Don’t tell anyone but, honestly, that sort of bothers me. I have a hard time just sitting on the couch without jumping up to do ‘one more thing’). People say I’m competitive, and I guess I am but I don’t usually think of it that way—I just want to be the best at whatever I do and I know I can as I am capable and confident. I do have a bit of a weakness for wanting to impress others and have them think well of me and I guess you could say that I ‘work it’ pretty well in a room, but doesn’t everyone? I mean, who doesn’t want others to respect and admire them?
“Who am I?” “What gives meaning and purpose to life?” These are a few of the questions that consume me, that I must understand and answer. Don’t bother me with the mundane, with the common. I seek passionately and deeply to understand why I’m here. I want to know myself to the depths and often I feel that it’ll never happen because something is missing, or worse, there’s something intrinsically wrong with me. Others seem so clear about who they are and their life seems so ‘perfect’. Sometimes I’m envious of them and I spend a lot of time wondering why I feel so lost on my own path in life. I know I have gifts, and that I possess something unique- something special. But I don’t think anyone, including myself, has really seen the ‘real me’ in all my glory. I long/yearn for that. You might say that I’m overly sensitive or dramatic; I do have a love of melancholy but please don’t ask me to conform. The ordinary is my death knell. I long for deep, authentic connection with others and with myself. Sometimes have difficulty appreciating present relationships as I yearn for what could be better. So let me live. Let me feel. Feelings, tell me that I’m alive and real.
I don’t like to talk about myself that much, but if I had to sum it up, I’d say I’m smart, innovative, and focused. I love to learn and am almost compulsively curious about all kinds of different things. I thrive on understanding what I study, and not just skimming the surface. I can spend hours, and in some cases decades, delving into the depths of something that fascinates me. Some people think I’m a little over the top in my passion for learning but that’s just the way I’ve always been—I am voraciously curious and have a strong drive to understand the complexities of how things work. In a way, my knowledge and perspicacity gives me a feeling of safety and security, and that must be important to me. I wouldn’t consider myself much of a people person, I definitely need lots of time on my own and a place that is just for me. Too many demands on my time and energy overwhelm me and I withdraw. Sometimes I wish I didn’t have to deal with as many people as I do. I’d be happy to spend much of my time on my own although I will say a part of me knows connection with others is important.
It’s hard to describe myself really but people say I’m dependable, thoughtful, trustworthy, and a good team player. I’m motivated by my need and desire for others to feel safe and secure. So I pay attention to potential danger or hazards, things that could go wrong. I watch for them and devise strategies to protect against them. I’m well prepared in that sense. Often when the path forward isn’t clear, I can become anxious and indecisive, seeking the opinions of others (sometimes valuing them more than my own). Usually I’m best at playing defense, although I sometimes take the offense to eliminate potential threats-- meeting them head on, without fear. Loyalty is also big for me. I don’t trust easily or automatically, particularly people in positions of authority – I am always assessing whether or not others are trustworthy. It’s just plain smart. If you do earn my trust, I have your back, and my support is solid and consistent. Same with organizations, I might challenge the leadership to determine if they are the real thing, but again, when I find an organization or a cause that is dependable, I’m committed. People say I have a good sense of humor and I can make light of myself. This helps me a lot when I get into difficult spots.
I have a sense of boundless possibility. I’m optimistic, enthusiastic, upbeat and I live for new experiences and opportunities. Others think that I’m constantly planning for the future. But my plans are mere sketches. Rather, I anticipate. I constantly think of what could be, might be, that which might bring joy and freedom to life. And in the process, I avoid anything that might limit my options. And because I don’t want to miss out on anything that might be glorious and exciting, my plate is always full. My calendar is often double booked. I have lots of energy and enjoy starting new projects, but implementing them, doing the nitty-gritty, can be a challenge, especially when doing so becomes tedious or boring. So I prefer to let others finish things. I’m happy creating. And I have the wonderful ability to think big, to see connections that others do not. One thing I’m clear about is that I never want to lose my sense of freedom. Therefore commitment can seem tantamount to death. So if you join me in exploring new possibilities and don’t get stuck in painful or unpleasant emotions or experiences we’ll get along just fine. Life is supposed to be enjoyed, let’s put our energy in the right direction!
PLEASE FEEL FREE TO CONTACT ME ON Alicia@nurturing-growth.co.za OR 082 922 1294 TO DISCUSS YOUR TYPE OR TO FIND OUT MORE ABOUT YOUR SCORE.
My office would be happy to assist you with a description of your type or to do a further in-depth typing interview should you need additional information.
Please make sure you have your 3 main numbers ready when contacting my office, in order of priority.
Enneagram Inquiry Process DOWNLOAD FORM